EFML:The inevitability of life

I sit in the car,watching the road zoom past.It's called NICE Road.Ironically,it brings out everything but niceness in people.Everyone's so happy there's no traffic that 120 seems like a good enough speed.People drive like maniacs.Accidents are just statistics here.Even if you're driving well below 80,the odds are that you're going to get hit by one these aforementioned manics who'll want to overtake you:P

It's another one of those journeys to college.By now,I'm used to it.I know for certain that just like I come home,I also need to leave to hostel.It might be days away or just hours,but the going back part is always there.Inevitable.In fact,everything about life is like that.Life itself,in fact.I'm here one day and sure enough I'll be gone someday.That doesn't mean I need to live all my life looking over my shoulder for Death(Sherlock S4E01 with the Merchant of Samarra is still very vivid in my head).

Although the comparison is orders of magnitude different,the analogy still holds.There's no point in feeling sad or lamenting every time I leave home.My mom is staring at me,trying to read my thoughts.When will you be back again? she asks.I can't give a date.There are no holidays in the foreseeable future.I shrug nonchalantly,brushing it off. Roughly around when? she insists,wanting to know.It annoys me.If I give a date and can't be back then,I'm setting her up for more disappointment.Worst-case it is then,I decide. I should be back in late March.I think there are a couple of holidays,I say.

Her eyes immediately fill up and she starts crying.Shit! I was too harsh.I try to make amends:I'll try in Feb,maybe just a day on some weekend.This does nothing to alleviate her tears.Coz this isn't about that.It's about all the pent-up sorrow of saying goodbye to her daughter.Of coming home to an empty house every night and missing her incessant chatter.Of eating meals alone while reminiscing of the times when a meal meant laughter,talk and cheer.Of rainy evenings spent watching movies.Memories of a lifetime.And now,it's all gone.Changed,just like that.

This is something I can't understand fully right now.I only have an inkling of what it's like.She still weeps,face averted.I know not what to do.There's nothing I can say to make this better.I rummage around in my bag to find a basket of fruits she's given me so that I stay healthy.Here,have a few grapes.

I know,I know.Lamest thing anyone's ever said to a crying person in all of time,right? :P I hold them out to her.She takes one and pushes the rest back towards me.Typical,isn't it?

I watch till the tears slowly subside.She smiles at me.I'm fine.

I know you will be,because you're the strongest person I've ever known:) May God always keep you happy.