NY:Carry your candle
Memories are weird.Your mind delves into unknown depths and comes up with a fragment that you've almost forgotten---almost but not quite,because it's still there,waiting to be overwritten.I think our brains come with more space than we can ever use up,but the addressable memory is very very less for most of us:P
I was having dinner this evening when all of a sudden I remembered this song.
This was the graduation song for the batch of 2010--basically my high school graduation.While each of us got a candle onstage,this song played in the background.Back then,I never paid attention to the lyrics.I was caught up in the tension of the moment--having to walk onstage clad in a saree(tough the first time),collect a certificate,a memento and this lit candle and walk back down.Without setting fire to someone's hair or burning your hand with molten wax.The burning hair might sound funny,but this one actually happened.With close to 200 girls walking in single file,it's an accident that's begging to happen!
Once I had accomplished this balancing act and was safely seated with hair intact,I felt the emotion of the song sweep through me.For so many of us,it was the end of an era.We'd never imagined living anywhere but in school and in these beloved classrooms.But it was all over and we were heading out into the world in different directions.Back then,we didn't even have phones of our own.We naively exchanged landline numbers that belonged to our parents and signed in each others' antiquated autograph books.Honestly though,I was a spectator to most of this.I wasn't close to many people and the ones who mattered were very few.Hence,it wasn't all that heartbreaking.But I did feel something on this last day.
There are many facets to being brought up in a convent school,strictly enforced discipline being the predominant one.But for me,it was the choir and the prayers.I've never been religious,but I'm very very spiritual.I think my school had something to do with this:the everyday reading of the bible--some verses that I can never forget.As a troubled teenager,there are many times when I've sought solace in the church next door and found it too.The choir was amazing.Everyday,there would be a song during assembly.This entire mass of 2000 people singing puts out a whole different energy.You can only relate to this if you've experienced it.Ah,those singing periods!We would learn classic hymns that are forever stuck in my head.
It's been seven years.Sometimes,it feels like it's only a day since I was given that candle to carry into the world and light it up.Paradoxically,it also feels like a lifetime since I've stepped out of that beloved building.
P.S:I should visit one day.But I'm scared.Scared that I'll be greeted by strangers.My teachers are gone.Juniors long since graduated.Only the building remains,standing tall,a testament to my childhood.
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