The lockdown journal: Seeing, but blind
"The opposite of every truth is just as true!"
-Herman Hesse
The first thing I read this morning was a news article on how a neurosurgeon who had died of covid-19 wasn't even allowed a proper burial. A gathering of people, who apparently feared contagion, opposed the burial by pelting the family and colleagues of the doctor with sticks and stones, which resulted in several healthcare workers being injured. The doctor was finally laid to rest by his friend, without his family present. The upset friend asks of the public in a video: Didn't he contract the disease because he treated patients? He could have refused to do so and stayed safe. And now, this the way he is treated in return, by being denied of something so basic a decent burial.
Wasn't it just yesterday that I spoke about the admirable kindness of people? It seems ironic that in less than 24 hours, I am forced to confront this other side of human nature--the ugly one. I am reminded of the quote above, of the ever persisting duality.
Blindness, by the sadly lesser known yet Nobel prize winning Jose Saramago, is a book that scarred me. It was as disturbing as it was compelling, and went into excruciating detail on the unpalatable consequences of an epidemic(in this case blindness) on human nature. I was deeply worried after reading this book, because the answer to the typical "What's the worst it could get?" is pretty dire.
Civilization is only a facade that falls away in the chaos, unleashing all the monsters within us.
This isn't the only incident, there have been quite a few. What do I write about these? I do not know, my mind is filled with woeful silence and despair. If we turn against the very people that are out there trying to protect us, what does that say about us? What message does this send to the medical community, to anyone on the forefront? What is to stop them from working for us, and aren't they justified? What is the point of hollow, empty gestures like clapping for 5 minutes if we can't even allow a family an opportunity to grieve the death of a beloved member? Because clearly the gesture did not convey any significance to this gathering.
My own mother is a doctor, a general physician, and she is still attending to patients despite my multiple pleas. There is not a single day that goes by where I don't worry about her, conjuring up many nightmarish scenarios. I worry about my 70 year old father and 90+ grandfather, who also risk infection from her. I ask her why she chooses to do this, and her reply shows a great commitment to her profession, to people: Because sickness does not stop with a pandemic, if anything it increases, and there are fewer doctors available. So many people need medical aid, and if all of us doctors think about ourselves and our families and stop practicing, what will sick people do? Where would they go?
And therefore, this injustice rankles deep within me. If a medical professional, someone who is the epitome of humanity and selflessness, one who prioritizes work over family and his/her own life, is treated this way, so bereft of the last shred of dignity and humanity, then what is the point of anything at all? We are not humans, but animals, perhaps even worse than them, for even they understand and respect grief.
-Herman Hesse
The first thing I read this morning was a news article on how a neurosurgeon who had died of covid-19 wasn't even allowed a proper burial. A gathering of people, who apparently feared contagion, opposed the burial by pelting the family and colleagues of the doctor with sticks and stones, which resulted in several healthcare workers being injured. The doctor was finally laid to rest by his friend, without his family present. The upset friend asks of the public in a video: Didn't he contract the disease because he treated patients? He could have refused to do so and stayed safe. And now, this the way he is treated in return, by being denied of something so basic a decent burial.
Wasn't it just yesterday that I spoke about the admirable kindness of people? It seems ironic that in less than 24 hours, I am forced to confront this other side of human nature--the ugly one. I am reminded of the quote above, of the ever persisting duality.
Blindness, by the sadly lesser known yet Nobel prize winning Jose Saramago, is a book that scarred me. It was as disturbing as it was compelling, and went into excruciating detail on the unpalatable consequences of an epidemic(in this case blindness) on human nature. I was deeply worried after reading this book, because the answer to the typical "What's the worst it could get?" is pretty dire.
Civilization is only a facade that falls away in the chaos, unleashing all the monsters within us.
This isn't the only incident, there have been quite a few. What do I write about these? I do not know, my mind is filled with woeful silence and despair. If we turn against the very people that are out there trying to protect us, what does that say about us? What message does this send to the medical community, to anyone on the forefront? What is to stop them from working for us, and aren't they justified? What is the point of hollow, empty gestures like clapping for 5 minutes if we can't even allow a family an opportunity to grieve the death of a beloved member? Because clearly the gesture did not convey any significance to this gathering.
My own mother is a doctor, a general physician, and she is still attending to patients despite my multiple pleas. There is not a single day that goes by where I don't worry about her, conjuring up many nightmarish scenarios. I worry about my 70 year old father and 90+ grandfather, who also risk infection from her. I ask her why she chooses to do this, and her reply shows a great commitment to her profession, to people: Because sickness does not stop with a pandemic, if anything it increases, and there are fewer doctors available. So many people need medical aid, and if all of us doctors think about ourselves and our families and stop practicing, what will sick people do? Where would they go?
And therefore, this injustice rankles deep within me. If a medical professional, someone who is the epitome of humanity and selflessness, one who prioritizes work over family and his/her own life, is treated this way, so bereft of the last shred of dignity and humanity, then what is the point of anything at all? We are not humans, but animals, perhaps even worse than them, for even they understand and respect grief.
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