Featured Posts of 2019

Resplendent memories: A travelogue

It is said that there is no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them. I couldn't agree more. Traveling expedites the process of discovering a person. Life has a way of gradually doing this anyway: as you spend more time with someone, you learn something more about them. But travel accelerates it.

When you travel with someone, everything is raw--unfettered by social charades. There are bound to be circumstances which are less than ideal: being hungry or exhausted or sick or even being in an unfamiliar place. What do you then do? Do you claw at each other in frustration? Do you act upon your impulses and take it out on your companion? Do you trust someone enough to take risks with them? Do you trust them to care for you when you are unwell? These are questions to ponder upon, and traveling sheds a lot of light on them. In this post, I will attempt to capture some of the answers to these from our travels in 2019.

I'd never been abroad before, and Switzerland was my first time. It was surprising in several ways- the food, the culture, the weather, the people. Although I was very excited about the new experiences it brought me, it was also somewhat of a shock for me. Sometimes, I think being away from home is like that-- while it sounds very glamorous in theory, there are darker aspects of it that people seldom bring up. Anyway, around the fourth day in our trip, I had ulcers in my mouth from all the coarse bread, and my digestive system wasn't doing very well either. By evening, I was feeling lost and homesick and borderline depressed. I had lost my appetite and the cold was bitter, chilling me to my bones. It was then that I saw the kindness of the man I had married. He didn't chide me for not wanting to go out, and ordered soup to our room for dinner. He coaxed me into eating a portion of it, and then  swathed me in blankets and put on a movie. I fell asleep in the middle, and woke up the next day feeling normal. The weirdest part was, I hadn't told my husband how I felt for fear of being a wet blanket on our first vacation. He had nevertheless understood me, and made sure to take care of me.

On that same vacation, I found that my mild mannered husband had a penchant for adventure sports. This petrified me, for my idea of adventure was reading a murder mystery or a courtroom novel, and here he was talking about paragliding and riding a toboggan down snow clad slopes. It was also a surprise to me, because he'd hitherto claimed that he was the farthest thing from what he called an adventure junkie. Anyway, there was a toboggan ride in the place we were visiting, and he asked me if I were up for it. I was a bit hesitant, but after listening to his account of what it entailed, I thought it sounded reasonable and agreed. We bought tickets, and queued up to the start. And that's when I saw it, and freaked out. The words did not do it justice-- it looked nowhere near a smooth slope, and the toboggan looked like a powerless piece of wood with one puny lever. I instantly imagined being thrown off and tumbling into the snow in an accident, and there were other scary scenarios that my mind was now conjuring up.

My husband saw this, and began to address each of my fears rationally. He explained to me in detail why it was perfectly safe and fun and why what I was dreading wouldn't happen. At the end of it, he asked me if I was now convinced. I was rationally, but like so many of our fears, this one was irrational too-- I was just scared without reason. I was ashamed for being so timid, and I knew he wouldn't go on the ride without me, and I didn't want to ruin things for him. Yet, I felt what I felt. I couldn't do this. He saw my expression, and understood. He told me that it was perfectly okay for us not to go. That I need not feel bad on his account, and that he was happy with my decision.
That did it for me. I found the courage, and went ahead and enjoyed the ride(still clutched onto that lever for life though!)

But what makes that incident so memorable for me is that he had the maturity to let me make the decision myself. That he didn't push me to do it, or made me feel insecure that I was less adventurous. That he was liberal and broad minded enough to accept my decision whatever it was. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is to give people the space to be themselves. My husband has always been very accepting of who I am, even when I have diverged from what he wants, and I could not be more appreciative of the fact.

I could give you a few more incidents, but having promised to keep this a drabble, I will leave it at this--two powerfully endearing incidents.

I love traveling, and traveling with my husband is even more memorable. Seeing every new place with him has made it unbelievably special. As I look back on our travels last year, I relive so many experiences and places, so many sights and smells.
I would be hard pressed to find a better travel companion than my husband. Not fussy in the least, he sheds a positive light on the bleakest of things. I recall we had fries for an entire day once because we couldn't find anything else to eat, but with him, even that was fun. He is always cheerful, and if I've had a bad day, it only takes a hug or a witty joke to cheer me up. He is patient and pleasant even when he is tired, even when all his energy is close to being depleted, and that makes life a great deal easier. He is always ready on time, and as meticulous and careful a planner as you could find. I hereby give him full credit for organizing all the amazing vacations we've had last year-- Mumbai, Chennai, Hyderabad, Kabini, Pondicherry, Mahabalipuram, Bandhavgarh and Kanha, and of course Switzerland. Looking forward to our future travels! :)

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